Warrior Mothers Supporting One Another

Ideas of how to offer "Aloha" to mothers living with child loss or a severely ill child

Approaching a friend while they are coping with loss can be daunting.

Do you ever?

Avoid the subject of their loss because you don't know what to say?

Feel like a "bad" friend Because you Haven't reached out as often as you want to?

Wish you knew what else you could do To support them?

You aren't alone! I can help you approach them

with courage and kindness

The Toa Mom Tribe Method

The Toa Mom Tribe Method begins with 3 Simple Steps:

Step I

Join the Toa Mom Tribe

Get access to  free resources

Be the first to know when a new podcast episode goes live

Get Mom Tribe Member ONLY discounts

Step II

Download your grief chat guide

Download your FREE guide that helps with what to say and what not to say.

Learn how helpful it is to say what you mean and show that you care without making the pain worse. 

Step III

Grab the Consider This Checklist

Learn which actions will be most helpful in supporting your grieving friend.

Get a valuable checklist of  arrangements  not thought of by loved ones coping with loss

Kicking off soon...

Fundraisers

Learn how you can Huddle together and support your loved one through fundraising events & community collaboration.

Printables

Stay tuned for more printables that can help you and your grieving loved one.

Podcast

*March 2022* I am honored to host warrior mothers & women who share their incredible stories of tragedy & triumph.

You can comfort and encourage your friend...

Hi, I'm Felila !

(pronounced F-e- Lee-La )
It wasn’t until I experienced my first miscarriage that I realized how many times I had thoughtlessly responded with some of the most well intentioned (but highly insensitive) comments when I heard of someone’s pregnancy loss or death of a loved one. So many of the comments I made can flooding back to me in the moments after my doctor said, “I can’t find the heartbeat.”

Sometimes we avoid bringing up the loss or trial of a loved one because we know it will make us feel uncomfortable. I promise you that if you will just TRY to feel discomfort for a small amount of time, to help your loved one share their heart, you will not regret it. I’m serious. Just. TRY!

When my son died, there were so many who reached out to me in kindness. Some of their comments, cards and conversations were so inspiring and I learned how much it helped to start with compassion and empathy. It literally changed my life.

My heart goes out to you all  (you and your grieving loved one). May your hearts be filled with understanding and compassion as you reach out to be there for them and as they navigate the journey of grief and coping from life’s unthinkable trials.

 "T U R N O V E R S"      &     L O S S E S

+ I’ve had pregnancy losses (miscarriages) that have totaled the count of a "football team" and then some.

+ In 2013, my baby boy -  Tamatoa, died. His condition was discovered only 2 hours before his birth.

+ In 2019 my oldest son was diagnosed with a severe medical illness that involved multiple complications and hospital stays. He just finished treatment in August 2021, Treatment was 15 months longer than it was supposed to be due to the severity + complications  of his diagnosis.

+ In that same year I was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression with suicidal ideation.

"CO M P L E T I O N S "    &    W I N S
+ My son is now "disease free" .
+ I have been blessed with incredible psychiatrists, psycologists, counselors and primary care physicians who have been instruments in  saving my life & marriage.

H A L F - T I M E   R E F L E C T I O N S 
The pain has been unexplainable.
It has been crippling  mentally, emotionally and physically.
+Some days I don't want to get back on the field.
+Some days I have to call an audible and re-define my focus for that day. 
+Some days I Fumble and it totally sucks.
+Some days I get an interception and I am reminded of the continuous Grace in my life.
+Some days I barely make it to another 1st down. 
+ And, some days I feel like I just completed the game of a lifetime and my JOY is unexplainable.

REGARDLESS OF THE GAME OUTCOME, 
The most important things to remember are:
+You have to get back up.
+You have to use the tools (things you learned in practice) to continue in the game.
+It's okay to walk to the sidelines sometimes.
+It's okay to take a break when you feel like you can't breathe.
+It's okay to rely on your team when you need help.
* Just promise yourself that you'll stay on the field.
* Just promise yourself that "It ain't over til it's over."
* Just promise yourself that when you feel like all is lost,  you'll glance back to the masses of fans  in the stands behind you and remember how much we've all got your back.
--> I AM  cheering you on, forever! Keep your head up &  show them what you're made of. You've got this !

As Featured In

NABEDC.COM
SUCCESS STORIES
Serving American Indians, Alaska Natives, Native Hawaiians & All Tribal Enterprises

MBDA.GOV

SPOTLIGHT ON FELILA THOMPSON- MORENO & WARRIOR LEGACY

This Not That Grief Chat Guide

Say the right thing to someone you love who is grieving

Thank you for trusting me with your email.

I can’t wait to get to know you and promise to keep your email address private.

A guide of
WHAT TO SAY
vs.
WHAT NOT TO SAY
when offering support to someone coping with a loss. 

Website designed by me using a template from Designed For Goodness | © 2021 – 2022

This Not That Grief Chat Guide

Say the right thing to someone you love who is grieving

Thank you for trusting me with your email.

I can’t wait to get to know you and promise to keep your email address private.

A guide of
WHAT TO SAY
vs.
WHAT NOT TO SAY
when offering support to someone coping with a loss. 

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